As we learn news about the dead and injured in the Nice attack, my heart is so heavy with sadness. This because of all of the children and families who have fallen victim. I spent many years living on a boat in France. Annual fireworks were held in my French town. My boat was always packed with excited friends and family, as we got better seating than most. The crowds gathered densely and were brimming with children holding light sticks and eating cotton candy. Bastille Day brings with it a strong sense of community, a feeling that we are all together in this world. It generally is a peaceful and happy celebration for all ages.

A child's toy is placed among the floral tributes laid out near the site of the truck attack in the French resort city of Nice, southern France, Friday, July 15, 2016. France has been stunned again after a large white truck killed many people after it mowed through a crowd of revellers gathered for a Bastille Day fireworks display in the Riviera city of Nice. (AP Photo/Luca Bruno)

A child’s toy is placed among the floral tributes laid out near the site of the truck attack in the French resort city of Nice, southern France, Friday, July 15, 2016. France has been stunned again after a large white truck driven by a solo perp killed many people after it mowed through a crowd of revelers gathered for a Bastille Day fireworks display in the Riviera city of Nice. (AP Photo/Luca Bruno)

Just hours before the attack, President Hollande had announced that the special security measures in effect would be lifted. France had successfully hosted the European Football Championships and there were some signs that healing might begin since the Paris attacks. With this attack that hope seems lost.

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The Nice attack made it so I could no longer stand a high school “friend” and Tea Party member who made a psychopathic attempt to make light of the situation. I have unfriended him. I have spent several years trying to make him see the frivolous nature of his racism and trying to get him to come around, but now I give up. No more trying to bring eyesight to the blind for me.

My phobias of large crowds seems more justified every day in a modern world where it is becoming impossible to know how to keep our children safe.